Chapter 9 - Standing Where the Glass Once Broke

Three months later, I stood in the Velvet Room and stared at the repaired pillar.
The new wood was darker than the old.
Jimmy had argued for replacing the entire thing.
I had argued against it.
“People don’t need a monument to the worst night of my life,” I had told him. “But pretending nothing happened feels worse.”
So the carpenter repaired the damage without hiding it.
A narrow seam remained.
You could miss it if you were not looking.
I liked that.
Some things healed better when they did not have to become invisible.
The club was closed for a private afternoon event. No music yet. No crowd. Just staff arranging flowers, checking lights, and carrying boxes toward the kitchen.
I was not wearing a waitress uniform.
That still felt strange.
A camera hung from my shoulder.
Used.
Mine.
I had bought it with money from three months of freelance work and one embarrassingly generous payment from a local newspaper that purchased two photographs I had taken during Boston’s first snow.
Matteo had offered to buy me a better lens.
I had declined.
He had sighed.
Then, because progress was real, he had never offered again.
“Still judging the pillar?”
His voice came from behind me.
I turned.
Matteo crossed the empty floor in a charcoal suit.
No entourage.
Leo waited near the entrance, but at this point I considered Leo less an entourage and more an unusually suspicious piece of furniture.
“You’re late,” I said.
“By four minutes.”
“You own watches that cost more than my car.”
“My watch says I’m early.”
“Your watch is corrupt.”
“That accusation could hurt its reputation.”
I lifted my camera and took his picture.
He frowned.
“Delete that.”
“No.”
“I wasn’t ready.”
“Exactly.”
He came closer.
“You enjoy abusing your access.”
“Deeply.”
The last three months had taught us how different ordinary intimacy was from crisis.
There were no dramatic safe-house confessions.
No kisses interrupted by gunfire.
There were dinners he arrived late to and apologized for.
There were mornings when I got irritated because his driver blocked my building’s recycling pickup.
There was one spectacular argument after he quietly replaced the broken lock on my apartment with a security system that required an engineering degree.
I made him remove it.
He did.
Then we chose one together.
That mattered more than flowers.
Greco remained in custody awaiting trial on federal conspiracy and weapons-related charges. Peter Nolan faced separate charges for the Harbor Pines attempt. Mason Pike had taken a plea on firearms and attempted murder counts after prosecutors confronted him with surveillance, ballistics, and payment records seized from Argent.
Colin, my former manager, had been found two weeks after the shooting at a motel outside Providence.
He had not been kidnapped.
He had been hiding.
Investigators eventually established that Luca paid him to disable the service-hall cameras and provide Jimmy’s spare access card. Colin claimed he thought he was helping arrange a private meeting.
Nobody believed that explanation as much as Colin did.
Luca’s case hurt differently.
He had not ordered the shooting.
Evidence supported that much.
But he had given Greco Matteo’s schedule, provided access to internal records, and kept helping after the bullets flew because he was too afraid of Greco—and too ambitious—to admit what he had started.
His attorney negotiated.
Matteo did not interfere.
That decision cost him.
I knew because some nights he still woke at two in the morning and stood at the window.
He never told me he was fine.
I never asked him to be.
My mother returned to Harbor Pines after two weeks.
The facility changed its visitor procedures, replaced the compromised service system, and gave her a formal apology she considered “too long but reasonably sincere.”
She also started walking farther with her therapist.
The first time she made it the length of the garden path without sitting, she called me before I could call her.
“I expect cake,” she said.
“You hate cake.”
“I expect the option.”
She had met Matteo for coffee twice since then.
Without me.
I did not ask what they discussed.
I valued peace.
A server carried a tray of empty champagne flutes past us.
Matteo stepped automatically aside.
I looked down.
“No broken glass.”
“I’ve learned.”
“Fear is a powerful teacher.”
“So is being stabbed in the chest with one finger.”
I poked him.
Once.
He looked at my hand.
I poked him again.
His eyes lifted to mine.
Around us, two staff members noticed and immediately found reasons to look elsewhere.
I smiled.
“Still terrifying.”
“Apparently not enough.”
“No.”
That was one of the things I loved about him.
I had not said that word out loud yet.
Loved.
It existed anyway.
Quietly.
Not because he had carried me through bullets.
Not because he had guards or money or a name that changed rooms.
Because when I told him no, he learned to hear the whole sentence.
Because when he was wrong, he could admit it.
Because he had stood in my mother’s room and explained danger instead of ordering obedience.
Because he had let his cousin face consequences even though it broke something in him.
And because every Sunday morning, when his schedule allowed, he brought coffee to my apartment and sat on the floor while I edited photographs.
He never asked why I took so many pictures of hands.
I never told him they reminded me that people revealed themselves most honestly when they forgot their faces were being watched.
Today’s private event was for the Harbor Pines rehabilitation fund.
My idea.
Jimmy donated the room.
Matteo’s legal foundation matched public donations, but only after I made him promise the match would be listed exactly like every other sponsor.
“No giant Conti banner?” he had asked.
“No.”
“Gold lettering?”
“No.”
“A discreet marble statue?”
“Absolutely not.”
He had looked wounded for almost a full minute.
Now he glanced toward the stage.
“You ready?”
“I think so.”
My photographs lined one wall.
Not crime scenes.
Not tragedy.
Hands.
My mother gripping parallel bars.
Jimmy polishing a glass.
Leo holding a paper coffee cup like it had personally offended him.
A Harbor Pines nurse tying a resident’s shoe.
Matteo’s hand resting open on a kitchen table the night he told me about Luca.
That photograph was my favorite.
He had seen it only yesterday.
“You made my hand look old,” he complained.
“It is thirty-five.”
“Cruel.”
Guests began arriving.
Doctors.
Nurses.
Families.
Local business owners.
Detective Walsh appeared in a dark green dress and immediately stole a canapé.
“You clean up well,” I told her.
She pointed at Matteo.
“He still here?”
“Unfortunately.”
Matteo put one hand over his heart.
“This event is becoming hostile.”
Walsh looked at me.
“You need anything, call.”
“I know.”
She meant more than the event.
So did I.
That was another thing that had changed.
Before the shooting, I had spent years believing independence meant never needing anyone.
My mother needed me.
I needed nobody.
That had been the equation.
It was also a lie.
Needing people did not make me weak.
Letting them choose everything for me did.
There was a difference.
The event raised enough money to fund additional therapy hours for residents who had exhausted insurance coverage.
Not my mother specifically.
Everyone who qualified.
That was important to me.
At seven, after the final guest left, I found Matteo by the repaired pillar.
He held two glasses of sparkling water.
“No tequila,” he said.
“Coward.”
“I remember what happened after two shots.”
“That was not the tequila’s fault.”
“You assaulted me.”
“I gave you corrective feedback.”
He handed me a glass.
The club was almost dark now.
Staff had gone home.
Jimmy shouted goodnight from the office.
Leo pretended not to exist near the front entrance.
Matteo touched the repaired seam in the wood.
“Do you ever think about that night?”
“Every time somebody carries a tray near me.”
“I’m serious.”
“So am I.”
He waited.
I looked at the pillar.
“Yes,” I said. “But not the way I used to.”
“How did you used to?”
“Like my life split there. Before and after.”
“And now?”
I thought about my camera.
My mother walking the garden.
Walsh’s card still in my wallet.
The apartment lock I had chosen myself.
Matteo asking permission with his eyes before touching me even when he already knew the answer.
“Now I think it was just one terrible night.”
His expression softened.
“That’s all?”
“No.”
I stepped closer.
“It was also my birthday.”
He groaned.
“I knew this was coming.”
“You owe me one.”
“I saved your life.”
“You threw me over your shoulder.”
“While saving your life.”
“You put me in a car.”
“Armored.”
“You refused to take me home.”
“Your apartment had been broken into.”
“I’m aware you have arguments.”
He smiled.
“What do you want?”
I pretended to consider it.
“No nightclub.”
“Reasonable.”
“No bodyguards at the table.”
“Leo will sit far away and suffer.”
“No surprises.”
“That eliminates gifts.”
“I accept cash.”
His eyebrows rose.
“Kidding.”
“Disappointing.”
I put my glass down on a nearby table.
“One dinner.”
“That’s it?”
“One completely ordinary dinner. Somewhere nobody knows your name. No private room. No one clearing tables because you walked in. And if anybody shoots at us, you’re paying the bill.”
He laughed.
“Done.”
I held out my hand.
He took it.
As we walked toward the door, I glanced back once at the repaired pillar.
The seam was still there.
So was I.
Not rescued.
Not owned.
Not waiting for a dangerous man to decide what happened next.
Walking beside him because, after everything, I still had a choice.
Matteo squeezed my hand.
“By the way.”
I looked at him.
“What?”
“You still talk to strangers like that?”
I smiled.
“We’re not strangers anymore.”
May you like
Then I poked him in the chest one last time.
“Keep up.”